The Host Club Answers Your Questions
by FreeVirtualHugs
Summary: Just some interactive fun! The host Club answers your questions! Humour
1. Chapter 1

**Ouran Answers Your Questions**

Me: Hello evey one, I'm Laura and I'm writing a question and answer fanfiction starring the Host Club!!! Say 'hi' every one!

Tamaki: Hello, my sweet pincesses, i wish I could see your beautiful faces as my heat aches for the pesence of a girl such as yourself. Oh, sweet goddesses of light, spare me the greif and appear! I am your sevant –

Me: Heh, okay Tamaki-senpai, that's enough. Oh, is it as alight if I call you by your first names?

Tamaki (who was put out but springs back to life) : But of course my little –

Me: Cool it, senpai…anyways, Kyouya senpai, if you will.

Kyouya: Hello.

Hikaru and Koaru: Hey!

Haruhi: Hi

Hunny: Heya!!!

Mori:…*nods*

Me: Alrighty then! Since this chapter will be a bit bland,I'll be asking the first question. Haruhi,

Haruhi: Uh huh.

Me: When you were introduced to Tamaki senpai's best cusomer and he went crazy and glomped on you, spinning around and probably suffo-

Tamaki: I was not! I was merely expressing my affections as Haruhi's father. Surely a father is-

Hikaru: No, it's because you use any excuse to touch Haruhi

Hunny: Tama-chan sure loves to hug Haru-chan.

Kaou: Face it, tono, when it comes to your 'daughter dearest', you are a bit of a perve.

Tamaki: WHAT?! How can you even suggest that! Mama! We cant let our daughter be exposed to such filthy minded people!

Kyouya: It cant really be helped, they are in the same class.

Tamaki: You'e are siding with them? How could-!

*I clap my hand ove tamaki's mouth and stick extra sticky duck tape over it*

Me: Just, be quiet while I ask the question!

Haruhi: thanks for that, they don't ever seem to stop.

Me: heh,no problemo! Okay, so when you were being attaked and you wanted help, why did you immeadiatly call for Mori-senpai. I understand he's probably the best person for the job, but you seemed little sour towards the host club at that time. I didn't think you would put that much trust into some one who you didn't know and who hadn't said word to you – no offence or anything Mori-senpai.

Mori: …*nods*

Haruhi: Huh, that's a long question.

Hikaru: Yeah, are all your questions going to be so in depth and stupid?

Kaoru: You were't kidding when you said this would be a bland chapter.

Me: I was curious is all…*pout*

Hikau and Kaoru: *whispers* Mori fangirl

Me: Beg pardon?

Hikaru and Kaoru: Nothing.

Haruhi: Well I was pretty frantic at the time and yes *stares at Tamaki* I was having trouble breathing. *Tamaki leaks two big crocodile tears and crouches to poke the ground with his finger* Umm, I guess I saw how Mori-senpai was so protective over Hunny-senpai, so I thought he might be the best to help me. He hadn't made me feel as if I were just the commoner – plus he got me outta there in a second. *smiles* Thankyou, by the way, Im sorry I never said so at the time.

Mori: Ah.

Hunny: Takashi was worried about you, Haru-chan, he thought about interfering before. I don't know why he didn't. Laura-chan, do you have any cake?

*twins and tamaki have panicked looks hearing that Mori wanted to help Haruhi secretly*

Me: I sure do- is strawbery okay?

Hunny: It's my favourite!

Me: Hehe, your so cute! Okay, well, while Hunny senpai eats his cake and I take the duck-tape off of Tamaki-senpai as painlessly as possible, if you guys could review then that would be geat! I garrantee that the first question I am asked will be put in the fanfiction! So until next time,

Host Club: The Ouran Host Club will be waiting for you…


	2. Chapter 2

**Until I get reveiws!**

Me: yay, that was a good first chapter guys, cookies and soba all around!

Kyouya: I didn't know you were poviding catering for this little gathering

Me: Well, I want you to be as happy as possible! Oh, by the way, Haruhi.

Haruhi: yes? *reaches for soba*

Me: I bought some otouro for you!

Haruhi: *eyes widen* aigatou!

Hunny: Aww, that was sweet Laura-chan. Haru-chan loves that stuff, ne, Takashi?

Mori: ah.

Hikaru and Kaoru: So what do we do now?

Me: We wait for comments and then the questions continue

Hikaru: What if no one comments

*I pout*

Kaoru: Or it takes weeks for some one to.

Me: well-

Both: You haven't thought this through vey well. Judging by how boring your last chapter was, no one will comment.

Me: *sarcastically* Oh, wow that's nice.

Hunny: Don't worry Laura-chan, people will comment and ask us questions! Don't be sad, if no one does you an ask us more questions. *crying*

Haruhi: Don't mind them their just diots.

Tamaki: For shame on you, insulting our hostess while she works her fingers to the bone to record this inteveiw, have you no pride as a host?

Both: Not our fault if we get bored with her. We need a toy…*sudden evil grins*

Me: uh oh…*sweat drop*

Hikaru: So, if you are such a big fan of the host club, which host is you favourite?

Kaoru: Every one has their tastes and dirty preferences…so who do you like?

Tamaki: Good idea you two! A chance to see our clientel from a boader perspective. So princess *invading my personal bubble* am I your type?

Me: *slight blush* no.

Kyouya: *comes from behind and speaks softly* Or is it me?

Me: *shudder* Why is this suddenly the torture the author game? No, you scare me.*blushing more*

Twins: Could it be us? *twins posing suggestively towards each other* We see you blushing.

Me: Ack! *true blush* Why have you all turned on me? What did I do? I don't like prince types or cool types or incest, im sorry but lets just stop now?

Haruhi: Leave he alone, you're harrassing her.

Hunny: What about me, Laura-chan, we both like cake, right!

Me: I'm so lucky I don't get faint vey easily…enough! Okay, enough, enough! *backing towards door*

Tamaki: Leaving so soon my little kitten?

Me: *shreiks and snaps* get away from me all of you! You big bloody perverts, just let me write my story in peace! It's not my fault no ones revewied yet!

Mori: *Walks up to the frantic author and places a finger to her lips and says soothingly* Laura, shh, calm down.

Me: …*tomato red*

Tamaki:...

Haruhi:…

Kyouya: …

Hunny: *smileing good-natuedly*…

Twins:…*smiling like the devil*We thought so…

Hikaru:You're…

Kaoru: a…

*kyouya discretely gets some earplugs into hi eas and leans against the wall, refreshed after his tiny but of torture*

Both: MORI-FANGIRL!!!

Me: I…I um well…y-you see…

Tamaki: So you have fallen for our wilde type, huh, princess? Is it his rebellious look, his scary demour or his faithfullness that attracts you?

Haruhi: (thinking: I really should help her, she did give me that otouro)

Me: None, I just think he's the kindest is all. But if he gave me a choice I would rathe be his friend than his girlfriend.

Kyouya: *quirks eyebow* some fangirl.

Me: Okay, no more fan girl talk! You two *pointing at twins* if you don't stop touring me, so help me, I'm goig to gte the duct-tape again.

Kaoru: Hikau, she's scaring me, I don't want to be covered in duct tape

Hikaru: Don't wory Kaoru, she won't get you, your too precious. But I'm afraid I'm going to have to tie you up with duct tape before the day is out.

Kaoru: Hikaru, you promised never to use it again! And – and why did you have to tell every one? *fake tears*

*Laura rolls her eyes as they twins cosy on up to each other*

Me: If you care even a tiny bit about my safety as well as my mental health you will review with a question! Please, I don't have the spirit of a rabid fangirl to go on!

Hunny: Don't worry Laura-chan!

Mori: We'll keep you safe.

Me: Th-thankyou…umm, remember everybody, the Ouran H-host Club w-will be w-wainting f-for you…


	3. Chapter 3

Me: yay! I already got to reviews! In your face you mean twins. Okay, I take that back but you were pretty mean to me.

Twins: Meh, you were boring us

Me: And that's why everyone started to torture me *remembers with a blush* Moving on! The first questions is from Darkdirengreygirl, cool name by the way, as she asks:

Hello! I'm really likin' your story but I was wondering what kind of bands  
each of the hosts listen to?

Me: Aww thanks, that means allot!

Tamaki: I'm for any sort of music, it is the ultimate language of love, you know. Notes like fevered words whispered in your ear and –

Haruhi: Senpai, just answer the question

Tamaki: *pout* well, I suppose I listen to things like mainstream, but mostly love songs.

Kyouya: I don't listen to much music, let alone note who made which song; I have more important things to do.

Me: Aww, life without music is sad *Kyouya glints his glasses glasses and the hostess cowers*

Twins: We like rock so…Kings of Leon, ACDC, Good charlotte, Greenday sometimes, Coldplay.

Hikaru: but I found a love song that perfectly described my undying love for you.

Kaoru: Hikaru…

Me: Undying love…? You're beginning to get lazy, that's something Tamaki would say.

Twins: Hey!

Tamaki: What wrong with what I say? *hugs knees*

Hunny: I guess I like happy songs but I don't know many bands, but my favorite song is 'I Want Candy'

Me: Gah, the cuteness! *huggles Hunny from love and protection from Kyouya* What about you, Haruhi?

Haruhi: umm, I don't listen to music much.

Me: Why are you guys so music deprived?

Tamaki: It's not our fault, we don't know commoners bands!

Me: Tamaki, Mori-senpai has to answer before we all start arguing.

Mori:… meditation music.

Me: Okay, thanks for the awesome question, Darkdirengreygirl! You are my first revewier! YAY!

*twins make tiny plastic poppers explode and confetti drop from the air*

Hunny: Look, Takashi, it's raining colour!

Mori: *smile*

Me: Aww…you two are so cute!

Hunny: *smiles* hee, thanks, Laura-chan!

Kyouya: But how exactly is Mori senpai cute? He's supposed to be fearsome and wild – hence we put him with Hunny senpai to balance it out.

Haruhi: I think the fact he takes care of Hunny is cute, Kyouya-senpai

Tamaki: Exactly right, how smart you are my little daughter!

Mori:…

Me: Okay, well I think I'd better move on to the next question! Okay, oh wow, these look good. This comes from ZYXS

Nice Story! I really like it!Oh, I also thought of some questions that you can  
ask the hosts.  
's true thoughts of each of the hosts  
's in Kyoya's filebook(I wonder...)  
's worst accident(other than dance party kiss)  
Hunny know about his alter ego(when he wakes up early,that would be  
funny!)

Hikaru: Who said they could ask more than one?

Kaoru: And how come none of them are to us?

Me: Don't be so self centered, besides I really want to hear Haruhi's response for her question.

Tamaki: So do I, make sure you are quiet you troublesome twins.

Kaoru: Us?

Hikaru: Troublesome?

Twins: We're never any –mmph! *Covers their mouths with extra strong duct tape that doesn't come off unless I spray it with special liquid or you tear it off which hurts like hell*

Me: If you try and take it off, it will hurt. Just be quiet please, we have allot of questions to get through! Haruhi…?

Haruhi: Well okay, Um, Tamaki I know your intentions are good and you try to be nice but you really are an idiot. *Tamaki runs off to grow mushrooms* Kyouya, usually you are okay but you seem to take pleasure out of adding to my debt and making people's lives tougher. Sometimes your downright scary. *pleased smirk* Hikaru is rather selfish but he seems to want to get better and Kaoru's is bit more sensitive and mature although he doesn't show it much. Hunny-senpai is a bit too energetic for me but he seems to be happy and he's not constantly perving on me which is refreshing. Mori-senpai's silence is a bit awkward at times but usually he's very nice and helps me out when I need it.

Umm, the end?

Me: Thanks Haruhi, what a wonderful response!

Tamaki: Daddy's so proud!

Me: Yes, I'm sure. Kyouya, so will you tell us what is in that notebook you are always writing.

Kyouya: To an extent…you may find some sections a bit…intense. *drops 20 degrees*

Haruhi, Twins, Tamaki and myself: *sweatdrop*

Kyouya: Basically I just keep the Host Club's earnings, funds and profit as up to date as I can, organize activities for the club, observe the reactions and statements of every member and customer for future references, and do thorough back ground checks on all the people we may encounter. Oh, and of course Hauhi's debt. Should I go on…?

Me: 0.0 no…no that's fine. *Kyouya smirks* Holy mother of … wow, I need to sit down. Um, tamaki you – you next.

Tamaki: My biggest incident, hmm, well seeing as a being as perfect as me doesn't make many mistakes…*twins roll eyes* I would have to say that my biggest error was making such a bad first impression on Ranka. He really doesn't like me…

Me: Oh, wow, a decent response, I'm proud of you Tamaki. * he bows*

Twins: mph! mmmeeerrrmbaaaa!

Me: Oh, right, okay, if you be relatively quiet.

Twins: *nod rapidly*

Me: *Sprays the tinny bottle of spray onto their mouths and the duct tape falls off* Now, have we learned our lesson?

Twins: *massaging their mouths and glaring*

Me: Good boys. *patronizing smile*

Hunny: Ano…Laura chan? I don't understand my question? Am I a different person when I wake up?

Me: Well, when you wake up you get a bit angry and so everyone is a little scared because they don't want you to use martial arts on them. It's not your fault really and every one still loves you even though you get a tad grumpy when you wake up.

*everyone looks at the girl as if she has gone mad and as if to say "A _TAD_ grumpy?!"*

Hunny: Oh, I didn't realize…I thought it was just Takashi teasing me. I'm sorry you guys *melts into tears*

Mori: *Holds up Usa-chan for Hunny*

Kyouya: Probably best to move onto the next question. There's only one more I think.

Me: Yes there – wait. How did you know that when I've got the piece of paper?....*Kyouya shrugs* Okay…this questions is from AirbenderBigMac

hmm...I suppose I want to know exactly what made each character want to join  
the Host Club.

Me: Good question but I think that it may aleady have been answered in the anime series. Go back and watch it again, I know I will. Okay, ladies first, Haruhi…?

Haruhi:*groans* Vase, debt. 'nuff said.

Me: Sorry to probe old wounds. Okay, Tamaki, as founder I think you deserve to go second.

Tamaki: *smiling like a lunatic* Well, I wanted, more than anything to make girl's happy. To make sure they get the happiness they deserved. To make sure that I could put a bit more happiness into the world…

Me: …thankyou Tamaki for your answer *smile* you may be an idiot, but you are a wonderful person.

All: *stares in surprise*

Tamaki: Well, thankyou…

Twins: Do you think she's switching to liking Tamaki now?

Me: Pfft, not likely. Okay, Kyouya.

Kyouya: It was a challenge, and still holds mild obstacles for me to overcome.

Haruhi: I really don't think you should bother asking him questions.

Tamaki: Mama?

Kyouya: Well, even if I had a second reason…I'm not likely to tell any of you.

Me: Aw, Kyouya, I knew you weren't all stone. You care about your friends, especially Tamaki. *touched*

Kyouya: *raises eyebrow* Did I say that?

Me: No, but you meant it.

Twins: You got that out of what he said?

Hunny: I think Kyo-chan would have left a long time ago if he had really wanted to, but he stays with us because we're his friends.

Tamaki: Mama, Daddy knew you loved this family even though you pretend you don't! Oh, Kyouya! *Tamaki, Hunny and twins go to hug Kyouya*

Kyouya: Touch me and I'll take out my phone and, personally, see to it that you eat your next meal out of a straw.

All: …o.o…*shiver*

Me: S-so Hikaru, Kaoru, why did you join the club?

Twins: We got bored.

Me: Oh really, is that it?

Hikaru: Yes, what other reason could there be?

Me: I don't know…maybe you decided that you wanted to have friends, you wanted to find some one who could tell you apart?

Haruhi: *mumbles* Its not that difficult…

Hikaru: Is it really our fault if we wanna find some one

Kaoru: Who can at least tell which one of us their talking to.

Me: I guess not. Okay, Hunny-senpai, what about you

Hunny: Well, Tama-chan told me that true strength is accepting who you are and I love stuffed toys and cake, its part of who I am. The Host club is where people accept me and I can eat all the cake I want!

Mori: *smiles*

Me: Aww, I'v got a forest cake, do you want it?

Hunny: Yay! Cake! Thankyou Laua-chan

Me: *squee* just save a piece for me, okay? Alighty then, Mori-senpai, you reason for joining the host club?

Mori: Mitzkuni

Me: Cool, okay well this chapter is amazingly long and I'v got more questions waiting to be asked! Oh, gosh how will I cope?

Twins: Should have thought of that before you started.

Me: Yeah, but don't worry, I'll manage. Okay! I'd better finish it here for now! Okay, please veiw and ask your hosts some questions. No swearing please. Until next time:

Hosts: The Ouan High School Host Club will be waiting for you…


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

Me: I'm so sorry. I literally have been buried in homework and have not been writing ANY of my stories much. Forgive me!

Twins: No *still annoyed about the duck tape and stick out tongues*

Me: Ha ha, you guys are so immature.

Hunny: Hi every one!

Me: Should we get into it, then?

Kyouya: How many questions are there?

Me: Two – wow! One of them is majorly long!

Twins: Whoop-dee-doo

Kyouya: How interesting *whips out notebook*

Me: Uh oh, that notebook can never be good

Tamaki: Laura, we should have some commoners coffee! I'm sure you know how to make it like Haruhi!

Haruhi:…

Me: Umm, I really don't think you need any more coffee, Tamaki-senpai.

Twins: We want commoners coffee too!!!

Me: *sigh* yeah, okay.

*she clicks her fingers and tray appears with seven mugs of coffee*

Tamaki: How…?

Twins How did you…?

Haruhi: How'd you do that?

Hunny: O.O ooh, Laura-chan is magical! Do you have a wand, Laura-chan?

Me: I wish! Nah, I'm the authoress so I can make anything possible!

Hunny: Anything?

Me: Yep!

Haruhi: So that's where or the food suddenly came from…

Me: ANYWAYS…moving on to questions number one! This is from **"sunshine ()"**:

**this looks fun! Question for the twins: when Tamaki first suggested you two  
use 'brotherly love' to attract customers you guys seemed to have no idea what  
that meant. Now you are practically experts! What kind of "research" (if any)  
was involved?  
Also, have you guys ever thought of switching roles? (meaning Kaoru would be  
the seme). (sorry this is so long!)**

Hikaru: Finally some questions for us!

Kaoru: We thought that no one was appreciating us. Okay, well, actually 'brotherly love' was actually not supposed to be so sexy, it was just a way to attract girls because we loved our sibling. Needless to say this was Tono's idea.

Tamaki: Hey!

Hikaru: And we thought we'd jerk around his idea a bit. We were just playing but we didn't realize it would be so popular so we caught on pretty quickly and do it all the time now.

Laura: Ha, I bet Kyouya was pleased after that.

Hikaru: Well yeah

Kyouya: It was risk, I'll admit, but it certainly paid off.

Hikaru: As for research…

Kaoru: We just improvise most of the time.

Me: Okay, thanks for that. But – hey! What about the second question?

Kaoru: No

Hikaru: We don't switch.

Me: Why? Only Haruhi would know.

Kaoru: Not the point, baka. Besides I'm better at blushing that Hikaru.

Hikaru: It's true

Me: A valuable skill I'm sure.

Haruhi: Wait, what's a seme?

All:….

Me: Ummm, moving on shall we!

Haruhi: Is it like a pitcher? ( from episode 4)

Me: *cough blush*

Tamaki: How could such profanities fall on my innocent daughter's ears!

Haruhi: Let go of me.

Twins: Yeah get off our toy!

Tamaki: She's not –

Me: QUIET!

All:….

Me: Ow, that really hurt my voice, don't make me do that again. Damn, I have a singing lesson tomorrow too. Okay next question is mega long so I'm gonna interrupt it so I can be sure all the questions are answered.

Hunny: Sure!

Twins: Whatever.

Me: Okay, here goes: This is from emorocks91

**Blah This is one of my old review from an old QnA, but I was too lazy to  
rewrite one and this one was never responded. I warn you though! It's UBBER  
long! and I'm not gonna MAKE you respond it, but it would be RELY nice!**

.

.  
*Pops out of nowhere like a ninja except Waka laka played in the background!*  
I, MIKA, AM HERE! XD sorry I'm not supposed to have slurpies, but I convinced  
my boyfriend to have one.  
ANYWAY! I have a bunch of question so get ready soldiers! 

Me: Heehee Waka Laka****

Ima start with a question for everyone...Man the fan girls will go crazy over  
this one! XD What would your dream girl be like and you have to give at least  
five details! AND THAT INCLUDES YOU TAKASHI! 

Mori: *sweat drop*

**Oh and Haruhi since your a girl, give what your dream guy would be like, and yes I know this will be adifficult task for you since your retarded when it comes to a real social life.**

Haruhi: Hey!

Me: Okay, Tamaki – dream girl – go!

Tamaki: 1) She would be as beautiful as me 2) She was extremely kind 3) She thinks I'm perfect 4) Umm, she can accompany my piano playing with another instrument, preferably her voice and 5) She would be innocent, cute and love peasant culture!

Me: Typical response. Okay, Kyouya.

Kyouya: 1) Smart, but not as smart as me 2) quiet 3) not needy 4) rich and affluent 5) help my family's name and business

Me: *sigh* that's so sad, you don't sound like you looking for love, Kyouya-senpai.

Kyouya: Because I'm not.

Me: Love is the world's most powerful and ancient magic, please don't abandon it. Oookay, Hikarua and Kaoru.

Twins: 1) be able to tell us apart 2) accept they will never be as important as our twin 3) fashionable and beautiful 4) fun to play with 5) likes to play pranks

Me: I bet there are allot of girls just dying to be in that position. Wow, you guys are answering pretty bluntly, thanks, it makes my job easier.

Kyouya: We simply saw how long the question was.

Hunny: There are allot of questions aren't there, Takashi?

Mori: ah

Me: Kay, how about Hunny, next.

Hunny: Yay! Okay, 1) She accepts me for me 2) likes cake 3) is cute 4) is really nice 5) ummm, I'm not sure. I think it's a tie between being nice to Chika or know how to make sweets.

Me: Awww! Okay Mori, you're up. Remember; five whole reasons please.

Mori:…

Haruhi: What's wrong, Mori-senpai?

Twins: Is he broken?

Hunny: Takashi gets a bit of stage fright when he has to speak allot. He's especially nervous because he knows there will be lots of people reading this.

Mori: *looks down and ever-so-slightly blushes*

Me: Awww that's so cute! *hugs Mori* I'm sorry but I've been dying to do that since chapter one. Stage fright is common, don't be embarrassed. *huggles*

Hikaru: He just needs to say five things, it's not like any one is asking him to perform on stage.

Kaoru: And we don't really know how many people read this.

Hunny: See, Takashi, I told you. Nothing to be afraid of.

Haruhi: *mutters to herself* I've always wondered if Mori-senpai was afraid of anything…

Me: *in heaven because of the cuteness* okay, so just imagine your speaking to only Hunny.

Mori: *nods* 1) Have to be friends with Mitsukuni ….2) Nice …..3) um…patient ……4) not demanding of me ….5) umm……cute? *tries to shrink into background*

Hunny: Well done! *climbs onto Mori's back and hugs his neck*

Me: That wasn't so bad, was it? *smile* Okay, Haruhi, you ideal guy. This should be good.

Haruhi: umm 1) He would be sensible and smart 2) he would respect me 3) he's accept that I want to put my career on a high priority 4) Yeah, he wouldn't ask allot from me or try to change me 5) eerrr...accept my crazy lifestyle and provide an escape from it I suppose.

Me: aww that's almost the same as mine! Hehe, I can see Tamaki is taking notes.

Tamaki: I am not, you're lying!

Me: Sure sure, whatever. Anyway, the next question is for you.****

Tamaki: First *smack!* that's for being stupid! Maybe it'll knock some  
sense in to you! Next, why do you listen to your grandmother when she's a  
total **, and that's being nice! You should do what you want, including see  
your mother. What's that old goat gonna do to stop you?! Also have you gone  
**?! You call Kyouya mother and you were acting a little weird chapter 3! XD

Tamaki: Ow! I'm not stupid, and that's not a very good reason to hit someone. *pout* Well, My grandmother…

All: *scowl*

Tamaki:…well she is the head of our family and she only wants what's best for father and his business. *withdrawn and genuinely sad* you shouldn't say such things about grandmother. She may be my last chance to see my mother again…

Me: *sniffle*

Hikaru: Oh my god, Laura's about to cry!

Kaoru: Really?

Laura: Shuddup you two, I am not. Umm, Tamaki, you still have another question left. *cough* I'm not going to read it out loud.

Tamaki: Of course I call Kyouya 'mother' because he is the mother of our family, just like I am the father. I'm not being crazy at all!

All: *smack forehead*

Me: Ah well you can't give two decent responses in a row, I guess. Okay, the next line of questions is for HUNNY!

Hunny: YAY my turn!

**Hani: *hugs* Sorry I've always wanted to do that! XD **

Hunny: That's okay! *smile*

**So what do you think of Haruhi, as in what's your relationship with her? I've read some pretty interesting fan fictions. Also how's Chika? If he's still mean tell me Ima  
give that boy a talk! XD Oh yeah and I'm supposed to ask you if you'll  
fight GG in a competition. She's 4 in the Nation and lost, but wants to  
prove herself.**

Hunny: What great questions! Haru-chan is my very good friend and she's so cute! I hope we can be as close when I've left school. She sort of feels like a little sister if I think about it! What were the fanfics about that made them so interesting? That's so nice that people would write about Haru-chan and me! *squee*

Chika is good, thank you for asking. I've stopped eating so many cakes in front of him because now I know how much it annoys him. He's training for a competition, so he is very busy with that and doesn't fight with me as much. He was very civil last week compared to normal so I don't think you need to talk to him. GG sounds very determined, I will accept the challenge!

Phew! That's the most talking I've done in one go! It's made me hungry, Laura-chan do you have any sweets? *loli-shota smile*

Me: Yes I do, and you have certainly earned it! *massive cream covered cake appears on a table* Dig in!

Haruhi: How he eats it all is still a mystery to me

Twins: Such is the mysterious Spartan coach.

Me: Hee, but he makes eating look so adorable! Mori-senpai, you're up!

**  
Takashi!: Talk more! You have a nice voice when you use it! I heard you sing  
Itsumo Soba Ni, so I know you have a nice voice! How'd you get you title as  
the Wild type? Seriously you seem like the most calm of the group. Also  
how's Satoshi? He's one of my favorite characters. Personality wise he  
reminds me of Rock Lee, just…Amazingly hot! XD**

Mori: Thank you, Satoshi is well, he also has a competition to train for.

Me: Gah, I love that song I learnt it off by heart. You do have a lovely voice; you shouldn't be so shy to talk more.

Mori: *puts hands in pockets and looks away* I Can't

Me: *sooo cuuute omg he's so shy!*

Hunny: *stops eating* Laua-chan, they MADE Takashi record that song when he didn't want to! They threatened him!

Me: How awful!

Twins: Well we did sort of sign a contract.

Haruhi: Well I don't think people who are uncomfortable performing would like it very much all the same.

Me: Aww, Mori-senpai *Huggles but is only tall enough to huggle his stomach*

Hunny: I said Takashi could sue but he decided against it

Kyouya: Probably the best solution.

Me: What about being the Wild type? Do you know why you were given that title?

Mori: *shrug*

Tamaki: I believe I can field that one if nobody minds!

Twins: Ah, Tono

Koaru: You were being so quiet

Hikaru: We had hoped that you had left.

Tamaki: And leave you two devilish twins alone with my little Haruhi, not likely! Anyway, Mori-senpai was given his title for two main attributes he possesses. Yes, usually he is very calm and quiet but at any moment he could leap into action with his amazing speed and strength! He also has that wild dangerous look that many girls love!

Haruhi: *mutters angrily* I can't believe how much thought he puts into this club.

Me: Me neither. Okay MASSIVE questions for the twins so I'm not going to interrupt, we'll all just wait until it's done****

Hikaru And Koaru: STOP BEING INCESTOUS! Blah! It's an act and your not  
hosting so stop! XP

Hikaru: Your slow! XD Kaoru picked up your feelings for Haruhi WAY before you  
did XD Pay more attention! Blah. Anyway, what's with the which ones Hikaru  
game? It's not like it's hard! Seriously! I could just start listing off  
differences. Your more troublesome then Kaoru, your pranks would go a lot  
further, but be a lot more badass, your less understand and more childish. You  
never hold back your opinion. Your actually a really pure person and will  
always be their with your friends. Hell I even have some physical differences.  
You have a deeper more rough voice, your eyes are sharper and slightly  
smaller, Actually most of your facial features are slightly sharper, if you  
look close enough. Geese, people are stupid. They always get my and my twin  
sister Kristina mixed up, but were polar opposites. I'm an outgoing tom boy  
and she's a timid girly girl. Oh taylor want's to know if you'll go out  
with her…Kristina asks too! XD

Kaoru: SAME THING! Being twins doesn't mean your half of a whole! It just  
means you have a lifetime best friend. So why did you give up Haruhi? I know  
you like her, you even confessed. Geese start thinking of yourself! 

Hikaru: I'm not slow! Shut up, you don't even know what you're talking about! Especially our physical features, we're called identical twins for a reason! Sorry, I'm not going on a date with a girl I've just met over the internet. *sulky*

Kaoru: We're not about to stop practicing our brotherly love just because some random person tells us to.

Me: You both ignored about five questions just then.

Twins: And we're not about to answer them

Me: that's just unfair, Mori-senpai had to give his five answers, so you should answer your questions too.

Hikaru: Whatever, we can't be bullied as easily as him.

Kaoru: You can move on now.

Me: *muttering* selfish little…OKAY fine, then its Kyouya's turn now.

Kyouya: Thankyou  
**  
Kyouya: So why did YOU give up Haruhi? Everyone says it's obvious that Tamaki likes her, but I think it's almost as obvious that you like her too. It made me sad.  
You two seriously would make a great couple! Also why do you wear glasses when  
you know you'd look more attractive without them? Why not contacts?**

Kyouya: "Give up Haruhi"? I was never with her or have any feelings towards her so why would I even bother answering this question? I'm sorry if it makes you sad but I am not getting any relationships now. As for contacts, they don't agree with me very well and I also like how they can hide my eyes if necessary.

Me: so totally creepie. Okay the next bundle is for Haruhi****

Haruhi: *smack!* 

Haruhi: Hey!

**That's for being so oblivious! Everyone in the host club fell in love with you at different levels and you didn't even notice! God, IM not even that bad, and I'm pretty bad. You should appreciate the host club more. Your life would be SO much more boring without them. What do you do that makes your dept keep growing so much?! Seriously, dose Kyouya secretly keep adding more to keep you in the club or something? Also If somehow you paid off your dept would you stay in the club?**

Haruhi: How am I oblivious, I know that Tamaki, Hikaru and Kaoru are pervets, so what else is there to know?

Tamaki, Twins: *crying* she's so oblivious!!!

Haruhi: And I do appreciate the Host Club but often they just frustrate me so much. They are also every smothering at times so that's why I enjoy my time away from them. To tell the honest truth *looks around before whispering* I think Kyouya-sempai does add to my debt because it seems never ending to me.

Um, if I paid off my debt…I really don't know I guess that's a bridge I'll have to cross when I come to it.  
**  
Sorry I wrote so much I was sugar high off a slurpie and had a lot to say.  
OH! And I don't know who my favorite character would be. I could probably  
get along just fine with anyone, 'cept the twins when they try to dress me  
up! *shudder* Lets just say Kaoru cause he would probably be the one I hangout  
with all the time when I'm bored.**

Me: OMG!!!! That was the world's longest question!!! Please no one else write something so long! Okay, every one, take five, that was hard work!

Hunny: I'll say!

Tamaki: She obviously had a lot to say to us, what a fan she must be! But how could she resist my good looks and –

Haruhi: Senpai, didn't you hear her, she was insulting you and wacked you over the head.

Twins: *laughing*

Tamaki: *grows mushrooms in the corner*

Kyouya: Should we move on?

Twins: What's the rush, senpai?

Kyouya: *smirk* well the longer we drag this out the less customers will follow it and our quality rating will drop causing the flow of new customers to dwindle slightly, which isn't very good because we are already saving up for Gold Week which, needless to say, will cost the host club quite allot. Also, the longer this drags out the sleepier Hunny senpai will become and of course we don't want to be the ones to wake him up. And after my observations, Laura wastes quite allot of time in the middle of questions and time is money when it comes to the management of the host club. But of course it's not only our time she's wasting, the longer she spends the less Laura will spend on her studies, making it pile up therefore she will ignore this story in a mad rush to get it all done, therefore it will just take much more time than if we were to hurry now.

All:…

Tamaki: Mama…?

Kyouya: Well, I haven't said anything for awhile and I thought I should point that out.

Me: I am so scared right now.

Tamaki, Twins and Haruhi: I know how you feel…

Hunny: Why is everyone so quiet?! *oblivious*

Me: I think we had better move on now. Well I'm finishing the hapte here because it is late and I am tir-ed! I absolutely loved this chapter and I'm so excited to see what comments and questions I get!  Until then, remember:

The Ouran Host Club will be waiting for you…

P.S. Okay guys I've just sent the Host's outside for a break until the next chapter! I'm looking forward to more questions from every one! If anyone has any fanfics or fanart that they would like me to see, please tell me! Omg can I just say this now - Mori is so KAWAII and awesome, I absolutely love him! And if you guys want to comment and dare him to sing 'Itsumo Soba Ni', it would be GREATLY appreciated!

Coming in the next chapter, we will have a DARE-OFF!!! That's right, I said it! You guys can dare the Hosts to do anything you want. But I won't be posting the comments if they are inappropriate (you know what I mean, you lovers of MOE) As you can see this chapter is very long, so I may take a short break before writing the next chapter. I will not be abandoning this story because it's SO fun to write!! See you soon, I hope!!!


	5. Chapter 5

Me: FORGIVE ME!!! I've had exams and basic skills testing, not to mention camps and Duke of Ed for so long and I haven't had ANY time at all to add to this story! I'm so sorry.

Tamaki: Laura, we were beginning to think you had abandoned us. But you wouldn't do that, right? *tilts my head up and is too close*

Me: Off, off, off! *sweatdrop*

Tamaki: Why, princess, who knew you were so shy *chuckle*

Twins: Prude.

Me: What?? Jeez guys, I know I haven't updated in a while but I just get back and you're sexually harassing me –

Tamaki: What???

Me: - and insulting me. I'm really sorry okay, but can we move on because we have allot of stuff to get through.

Hunny: We're sorry, Laura-chan! *adorableness*

Me: Its okay, I can never stay mad at any of you guys 

Haruhi: Really, I can.

Twins: awwww

Tamaki: Haruhi, don't be so cruel to your father! *tears*

Haruhi: *sigh* at least now I have a sensible person to talk to.

Me: Right back at ya.

Kyouya: Laura, we need to talk.

*I gulp and every one moves away in fear*

Kyouya: I've been going over the files for this little interview and I noticed you declared this chapter a 'dare-off'. Would you care to explain this little typo as I know I consented against this action during the paperwork? Do I have to call my lawyer?

Me: No, senpai, it's just that um, well the idea was so common in other ask fics that I thought…

Twins: Dares from crazy otaku's? What the hell, we're not doing that!

Kyouya: Quite you two, Mummy will handle it.

Me: *shiver* well umm, I suppose, but I have comments from people…

Kyouya: Well then I'm sure you'll just have to send them all apologies and explanations of your little mistake…won't you. *is emitting purple aura of evilness*

Me: *whispering in terror*yes, okay I'll do that. Don't kill me.

Haruhi: My advice - run.

Tamaki: Laura, how could you deceive us???

Hunny: What's a dare-off?

Kaoru: *eating a banana*

Kyouya: *still smiling and evil*

Haruhi: Seriously, I would run.

Me: *trying to compose myself* Um, okay, sorry every one but the dares are off…I'll just skip to plan B

Hikaru: What's plan B?

Me: Well, I have some friends from school who would love to meet you guys and who have question of their own.

Tamaki: More commoners! That's a great idea! And with more lovely ladies we can hone out abilities even more!

Haruhi: Hone our abilities…?

Tamaki: Why yes, my little darling, to see what kid of hosts these girl like the best.

Haruhi: *groan*

Me: Oh, and if we have time, maybe Kasanoda-senpai could join us for a bit, that would be fun.

Hunny: Aw, Laura-chan that's so thoughtful.

Haruhi: I haven't seen him in a while, that would be nice.

Tamaki: But he was only a featuring character!

Me: So?

Hikaru: so why should he be here?!

Me: 'cause he's nice and I like being difficult. Plus I think you owe him a tiny apology for that kitty maid outfit incident, as funny as it was.

Tamaki: That was the twins, not me!!!

Hunny: The ears didn't make him cuter at all

Mori:…

Haruhi: We're going in circles here, guys. Can we just get on with it? I have some laundry to do when I get home…

Me: Oh, Haruhi, always so enthusiastic. *smile* Okay so I'll just read out the questions from my friends. They both write some fanfic but they won't get a damn account on this website so I can't prove they exist. Please know that I am not asking these questions. Lexi and Molly are.

Me: Okay Lexi says:

Omg, hi guys! This is so cool, I love your ficcy Laura, its so cool. Omg I can't wait until you post this! You need to post it sooon! Okay, Kaoru, you are awesome! In our group of friends at school I am known as you. FYI: Laura is Hani and Molly is Kyoya :P

I also love Hani for obvious reason cuz he's just so cute and Haruhi cracks me up! Questions time: Mori, do you like cake?

Tamaki, Omg, you're so funny, I don't why people are so mean to you (including the other hosts) and I was wondering if you could speak fluent French? I know some.

Bonjour Tamaki! Je t'aime, tu es très drôle et vous avez du plaisir à dessiner. Je suis somthing d'un artiste en herbe. Avez-vous déjà mangé des escargots, j'ai tout à fait qu'ils ont été savoureux.

Me: Yay, go Alexis and her French!

Haruhi: She's very good at it.

Tamaki: Ah, my native tongue! Of course I can speak French! Merci pour vos aimables paroles! Je suis heureux que vous pouvez parler français! J'ai mangé des escargots de nombreuses fois, mais j'aime la nourriture japonaise plus de Français. Merci beaucoup pour votre question!

Hunny: What a different language!

Mori: Ah

Kyouya: It is famous, you know, and allot softer than Japanese or English.

Laura: Okay, I'm not even going to bother translating all of that! If you guys can, well done, If not, just get a translation off the internet. Okay! Moving on, she's not done:

YAY! Omg I love all of you guys, you rock and you are all just AWESOME!!! Okay, I love you Huni, you are so cute and I just love you! *huggle* Okay, Haruhi your really great, and I seriously can't remember if I already said that lol

Okay bye!!! I love you allll!!!

Me: Now Molly!

Molly: Hey everyone, especially Laura, this is a weird but cool story. Yes, it is true; I am quite like you Kyouya. My questions are pretty weird: Tamaki, you're an idiot. There was no question there; I just wanted to tell you that.  Hani: You're okay, and your very cute so you rock in that way. Be nicer to Mori when you get a cavity next time. Hikaru, I like you the best *smile* and Kaoru is awesome too. Have you guys ever kissed? Also, Haruhi, I dare you to slap the next host who hits on you, no matter how small. Haha. Oh, and I dare Laura to abstain from hugging for three minutes.

Me: Nooo! Molly how could you!!!

Molly (some where in the world): Mwa ha ha

Me: *weep* okay fine *pout* well there was Molly's letter.

Kyouya: I doubt you can be as evil as me, but I am intrigued by the challenge. The thought of some one else comparing them to me is very interesting for the simple reason that you have no idea who I am.

Laura: Well then, that was sufficiently scary but if any one could give you a run for your money, it is Molly. And she's really nice 

Haruhi: Sounds suspicious to me

Hikaru: You sure have weird friends

Kaoru: I mean they pretend to be us, that's kind of creepy.

Laura: Hee, well you should see me when I'm around Harry Potter…I make Renge look positively _tame_.

All: *shiver*

Me: Well, that's all from me, what do you guys wanna do now!

Hikaru: Get out, this is so boring.

Kaoru: yeah, this chapter really is a bust.

Tamaki: *pout* It's not her fault, Kyouya wouldn't let her post the dares!

Twins: Who's fault is that?!!!!

Me: Mine, okay so will we finish now?

Mori: Ah.

Laura: Kay, in the mean time, who wants ICE CREAM!

Hani: I do, I do!!!


End file.
